Pratitque de Base -- Lessons 3-4

Lesson 3

• Gratin of Hard-Boiled Eggs -- one of the oldest recipes known in France (cookbook claims there are copies from the 17th century), this is simple and elegant. The problem is that my family has preconceived notions about eggs -- what they should look like, when to eat them, etc. Their closed minds meant my intake went up (along with my cholesterol). Delicious, but not even The Boy liked them.
• Poached Swordfish with Pearl Onions and Mushrooms -- A variation on the veal chop recipe (my concession to Donna's insistence that we limit meat intake). This is delicious! BFP pushed aside the pearl onions, but loved the 'shrooms and fish. Donna and Andre loved the whole thing. It was fabulous. LFP was a no-show.

Time: 3.5 hours Complexity: 6 (of 10) Cost: $76.59* Mess: 7**

Lesson 4

• Smoked Salmon Crepes -- Wow! A big winner all the way around. Macerating the salmon (soaking in milk for 2 hours) made it really tender and less "fishy". Disclaimer: I am intensely annoyed by the non-specific complaint "it's too fishy". When's the last time someone complained that a t-bone was "too meaty". It's a stupid comment that should die a quick and unhonored death. However, this maceration method will help certain people with the designation FP (Fuss Pot) transition into more fish consumption. LFP ate the plain (but homemade and nicely prepared) crepes. For the rest, it cut like a sushi roll. A big winner that should be repeated. Leftovers were (nearly) equally good. Update: Deidre has made this dish the buzz of Mendham Township Elementary School, Grade 3. Julia Neihoff tells Deidre: "I hate salmon, but I want to try it!" Confidence is low.
• Roast Leg of Lamb -- Another bastardized recipe (hey, no one in France is actually reading this -- which reminds me: Deidre, Alaina and their friend Grace Shin call me "Uncle Fritz" for reasons which escape/do not interest me. Andre looks at me and says "Hi, Uncle France!" Ok, I'm Uncle France.) I used a yogurt marinade (Donna gets an endorphin rush when I use already purchased ingredients from the 'fridge), including thyme, oregano, garlic, marjoram, lemon juice and sliced onions. Will definitely do this again, but four hours was not enough -- this is what will now be referred to as a Spitzer -- it's an overnighter. Convection roasted it for about 50 minutes (6 lb. leg) and it came very rare.
• Swiss Chard Gratin -- Another surprise winner! First time cooking chard -- it's expensive (about $8 for two servings for the family). Difficult to work with the white part (it's stringy and needs to cook a while) but the greens, after blanching, baked up deliciously. I screwed up by layering too much gruyere cheese (12 ounces, grated) thinking that would be a selling camouflage for the kids. Turns out they would've been fine with half that much. Good for leftovers.
• Chocolate Mousse with Hazelnuts and Whisky -- (substituted for Pineapple Sorbet, as I find non-machine-made ice creams and sorbets to be slushy ice baths...the kids enjoyed fresh cut pineapple much more than they would have liked the sorbet). I need to work on this one -- sugar did not dissolve properly. I skipped the hazelnuts (forgot to buy them) and that would have covered up the crunchy granules of sugar. Kids were ok w/it, but it wasn't ready for a more sophistimacated palate. Oh, and I was out of whisky, so I used dark rum instead. It was a good substitute.

Time: 3 hours Complexity: 5 (of 10) Cost: $62.65 Mess: 7*

*- Why do roast pans with drippings drive Donna crazy? And what possesses me to leave them crusting on the counter until the next day...every time?!?

Non-Lesson Meal

• Grilled Swordfish (marinated in soy sauce, garlic, ginger, sesame oil and olive oil) -- wonderful! 5 minutes/side undercooked the fish...needed about 7 minutes/side to do the trick on the giant Weber grill.
• Hamburgers -- again, a freezer leftover item that just sent Donna into happyland that we used it. I could smell the estrogen from across the room (but it resulted in nothing as I ruined the romantic mood by making her watch Hurt Locker...big Pollack dummy).

First day this year we were able to eat outside. Deidre and I had planned an April Fools joke to play on Donna (telling her I was taking a job in Taipei and she should start learning to speak Mandarin now...Deidre was ready to say "wo bu mingbai" -- I don't understand...Donna's key foreign language phrase) but we didn't get it done. I substituted with a trick on Deidre -- she cut her toe and I put a giant bandage on it, covered it with a plastic bag and told her she had to hold it up in the air all night. I even offered to get rope and tie it to the ceiling light in their room to help. She fell for it, but said afterward she was humiliated. She has such a good heart, she can't believe anyone would ever lie to her. I am a bad person.